This has been a very busy summer. Unfortunately for the kids, it was a somewhat ho-hum summer. We didn't take a family vacation or do too many exciting things, and now the summer is over and school is starting in a few days. The benefit of having a father who is a teacher is that the kids get to spend a ton of quality time with him. The downfall of having a mom who is a real estate agent is that when daddy is not working, mom usually is working. Which leaves very little time for us as a family, which I very much regret, but know that this is what is important for our family right now. For the pasts few months I have been very busy with work, being a real estate agent, working part time at the local YMCA so that we can get our membership benefits, and putting time into our Down syndrome awareness project, http://www.321downstreet.com/, so when I have time with the kids my mind feels occupied with so many other things. I just keep telling myself that soon, this too will pass (the busy feeling) and life will be back to normal (whatever that may be???)
I know to many people our "normal" life seems so un-common and chaotic. But for us, it is typical. I know that we were meant to have this life and we make the most of everyday with our kids. I can honestly say that I have only once looked at our life with regret. Two days after Aliza was born I was very emotional and feeling overwhelmed and angry at God for choosing me and Tom to raise a child with Down syndrome. I remember feeling so sad and sorry for myself but also for her and for the struggles that she would have in her life. I was not sure that I could rise to the challenge that I had in front of me to parent this child. We were sitting in the driveway of our home, I had just been discharged from the hospital, but our baby was in the NICU. We had come home with out her that evening and we were only home for 3- 4 hours when in the middle of the night I woke Tom up and told him that we needed to go back to the hospital to be with our baby. I was going to sit at her bedside night and day until she came home with us. It was at this moment that I realized that nothing was going to stop the bond that I had already developed with this little baby. She was ours, and I loved her and we were going to get through this (the unknown) together. For years I felt so horrible for feeling those feelings of anger at her diagnosis, but now I realize that these feelings that day have gotten us to where we are now. It was that day that I committed to giving her the best that I possibly could. We have fought to get her the best therapy, education, and services that are available. And while we acknowledge that her ability to achieve in comparision to her peers is delayed, we also know that we can not just sit back and accept a mediocre (our definition) life for her.
Together we chose to bring her into this world; she is strong and has survived many physical challenges, including open heart surgery. To us, this life is "normal" There is chaos and lots of driving to and from therapy, and appointments and meetings, but I am ready for that "normal" life again. I am ready to say goodbye to summer and get back to the routine of our lives. Aliza and Trevor are also eager to start school. Aliza will be in Second Grade and Trevor will be in Kindergarten. As much as they fight with each other, they are looking forward to being in the same school togther. And I am looking forward to one pick-up/drop off, and having one school to devote my volunteer time to. Ella will be in preschool two days per week. I am actually going to have real time to myself to work and finally get things done so that when the kids get home from school it will be less chaotic... ha, ha, we'll see!
