Tomorrow I am presenting on behalf of the Special Olympics and the Spread the Word to End the R-word campaign to 850 Middle School students. I thought I would share my presentation with everyone.
My name is Kristin Pidgeon and I am a mom to four children, Quinn is 1 ½, Ella is 5, Trevor is 7 and my oldest daughter Aliza is 9. All of my children are special to me, but today I want to focus on Aliza.
Aliza is an amazing athlete, wonderful daughter, sister, granddaughter, cousin and friend. She is a dancer, she is a singer, she is a swimmer, she is a friend. She is a person with Down syndrome. She is not retarded.
Today I am here to talk to you about how the r-word has impacted me, my child and my family.
First let me tell you a little bit about Down syndrome. Down syndrome occurs when some or all of a person’s cells have an extra full or partial copy of chromosome 21. This additional genetic material changes the course of development and causes the characteristics associated with Down syndrome. People with Down syndrome attend school, work, participate in decisions that affect them, and contribute to society in many wonderful ways.
How many of you have ever won a Gold Medal in a competition? My daughter has won 8 Special Olympics medals… Three in horseback riding and five in swimming. She is on the cheering squad at her school where she is in a regular education classroom and has lots of friends. She will one day be a student here at Springer. She is really looking forward to going to middle school and getting one step closer to becoming a teenager. There are students here at your school, at church, at the mall, in your neighborhood, everywhere in your life who have cognitive and developmental disabilities. Please do not use the r-word. Do not break their spirits, their dreams, their hearts.
I do not fault others for their use of the r-word, because the term has become slang. They don't mean to be hurtful towards people with disabilities. Before I was a parent, I used to call annoying situations "retarded" before I understood. I have no problem with the words "stupid" or "bad". Sure, call your friends names if you'd like, it's your conversation. But please, don't use the r-word.
Many people use the r-word, and barely realize the amount of harm they are causing, referring to a foolish person or silly mistake, the word RETARD or RETARDED has been incorporated into the everyday language of today as a synonym of something "bad" or "stupid." The R-word is hurtful when used in jokes or as part of everyday speech.
For disabled people, this type of humor strikes directly at who they are. When you use the r-word people with disabilities are the punch line. That means essentially that you are calling my cute, funny, friendly, loving and talented daughter stupid or bad.
There is an old saying: "Sticks and stones will break my bones but names will never hurt me." Even when I chanted it as a child, I never believed it. I often felt that people who let words hurt them were not strong enough. But now I understand that words do hurt -- they break people's spirits, they break people's dreams, they break people's hearts.
It is my job as Aliza’s mom to make sure that she is surrounded by opportunity and compassion and support. When you use the r-word you are hurting my daughter. She is not stupid. She is not bad. She is not RETARDED. My daughter is disabled, but that does not mean that she does not understand when people are being mean and hurtful. Aliza understands when people are not being nice or are saying things that are hurtful. She understands when others go out of their way to avoid her and she knows when people are annoyed at her presence. People with disabilities have feelings and deserve to feel accepted. By eliminating the r-word from your conversation and for standup to others who use offensive language, you are making your school, your neighborhood, our community and our world a welcoming and accepting place for people with disabilities.
I have a short video to show you the spirit of Aliza.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sau_6KqYPIo
Please join me in taking the pledge to Spread the Word to End the Word
The beginning of the school year always marks a new year for Trevor. He is 8 years old today! Over the summer he completed his first 5K and is ready to train for more! He is turning into quite a young man. I noticed today how influential his father is on him. I heard the garbage trucks and knew that because of the hectic week that we have had, that our trash was not on the curb. I started running to get the cans and my second in charge ran to get the recycling and brought it to me at the curb. Then as I was heading back to pick up more recycling he pick up the recycling tub and brought it back into the garage without being asked... a little thing, I know, but an important step in growing up. He could have just walked past the bin and gone back in the house, but he did the right thing and followed through with the task and didnt leave it for someone else... just like his dad would have done. Now I'm not suggesting that he would feed the dog or take out the trash without being requested to do so, but I believe he is starting to realize that he is responsible to helping to maintain our home too. That's a BIG step, especially when you live in a family with 6 people. It give me hope that maybe we are doing some things right and although there are many frustrating and chaotic moments, our values are getting through!
